This is topic Can't we just kill all the stupid people? in forum Film Handlers' Forum at Film-Tech Forum ARCHIVE.
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Posted by Tom Kroening (Member # 201) on 10-02-2000, 02:28 AM:
ARRRRRRRGGGGGGGGG!! I swear no one ever listens to me. Today I come in ad 5:30. Chat for a while downstairs so I can get an understanding of what went on today. I run upstairs, read the log, and start threading up. I get to one of the houses on the end (Nurse Booty) and the processor is dark.... ITS IN BYPASS!!!! There was nothing about this in the log. And this isn't the first time either. Its happened in multiple places. It turns out that the sound had jumped into dolby stereo a-type and wasn't at the proper sound level. I had taught the new manager now to use the cp-65 and what everything means so he promptly put it into SR (because the DTS is in for repairs). One of the other managers thats been there too long and doesnt know sh!t and doesn't care goes and puts it in bypass, telling the GM that he fixed it. I swear Im going to flip out on this guy next time i see him. I've told him many times. Im ready to give him a copy of the cp-65 manual for him to take home. If there is EVER a need for him to put the processor into bypass then he better have made a phone call to the tech and have him coming out to fix it because something would have had to blow up/burn out. Maybe I am over reacting, but people keep on doing stupid stuff like this.
Posted by Bernie Anderson Jr (Member # 410) on 10-02-2000, 08:27 AM:
I understand. It's frustrating. I get the same thing in my booth too. I'll come in and look into the log and see "No Prob" They're even too lazy to write out the word problem. I go to start my first movie and find a splice in the first trailer that was new two days ago when I first put it on. Why is there a splice there. No one noticed it. Four operators work in the booth and no one noticed it and no one will take the blame for it. I just want to know what happened. I have one girl in my booth that never sets the intermittant and ALWAYS comes on screen out of frame. And what's worse is she never resets the framing knob. Never mind that her loops are too big and that when she turns the framing nob the film wraps against the housing of the XL now scratching the print. Then when I bring it to her attention she says that she never noticed any scratches. How the hell can't you see hash mark scratches in the middle of the print.I work in a GCC that's 90% kids that they get from the concession stand and 10% Union (me for 10 hours) I'll put a print together on Thrusday and come in the following week and there will be about two green scratches on the print I put together the week earlier. They tried to blame it on one of my operators that got kicked out when GCC knocked our hours down to ten a week. But they neglected to say that at the same time one of their screw ups left to go back to college. Nothing is management"s fault and they act as if you don't know what you're doing. Oy!
Posted by Randy Stankey (Member # 64) on 10-02-2000, 04:10 PM:
Hey! That's what keeps me in a job! 
As long as there are lots of stupid people there'll be lots of work for us smart people!
Posted by Michael Pace (Member # 553) on 10-02-2000, 04:53 PM:
Isn't it amazing that human nature seems to tt be the same the world over.Mr Nobody is one of the most common people that seem to be around. The Smiths and Jones appear to be a diminishing surname.
Regards,
Michael.
Posted by Ari Nordström (Member # 288) on 10-02-2000, 05:29 PM:
I remember an extra whom I tried very hard to keep away from my booth. He had caused repairs for thousands of dollars at various points during his career, trying to "fix" things in and outside the booths, usually something that wasn't broken to begin with. He also liked to change the order of things when working a day or two. If they gave hím a weekend, he would replace most of the trailers and tags, and reprogram a multiplex if given half the chance. There was no stopping him.The day finally came when the management forced me to give this guy a saturday afternoon. I was to replace him at 6 pm, after three "Lion King" shows, and the management was pretty adamant about using him, in spite of my protests. I'd been rather vocal in my criticism, too, so they even went as far as to have a tech check the theatre that same morning to ensure that I hadn't made the extra's life any harder it should be...
I hadn't. I knew he'd take care of it all by himself.
At 6 pm, I strolled down to my theatre and was met outside by one very angry usher. He asked me who the hell the idiot in the booth was, and could I please just shoot him right now. The whole staff would be glad to help me hide the body and come up with an explanation in case anyone missed him. Patrons had been out to complain the whole afternoon. Three shows and 1500 people of which a remarkably high number had been out at least once.
I didn't have to repair that much after him, actually, and it didn't cost the company more than a hundred or so. Some mechanical adjustments to the gates and the installing of some minor spare parts, was all. The note inside the Dolby processor ("KEEP OUT!") had obviously scared him off there.
The extra never returned to us, but they still use him at the local multiplex. Beats me why, but the management of that company was never good at listening anyway. They deserve him.
Posted by Kevin Crawford (Member # 469) on 10-03-2000, 12:11 AM:
How is this for stupid people being blessed by God. This one individual thought that he knew everything. One day the lamp won't light. He swears up and down that it is the bulb. And he was going to change it. The Asst. manager gets on the phone with me and tells me what is going on. I tell her to stop this guy from changing the bulb. By the time I get there, 45 minutes later, he had removed the bulb. This is from a Christie CK console. He never took the coverplate off of the plenum. He knew that the bulb screwed in from the new one that he had, but he couldn't figure out how to get the old one out. So he used pliers to remove it. Grasping the end of the bulb and turning it until it came out. Then he put the new bulb in as far as it could go. Thankfully, he did not try to use the pliers on the new bulb.
Now can anyone guess why the lamp wouldn't light?
Not a diode.
Not that the breakers were not turned on.
He had turned off the roof exhaust fan switch that was by the platter while he was threading up.
How is that for being blessed.
Posted by Ari Nordström (Member # 288) on 10-03-2000, 04:05 AM:
Another story about an extra:About ten years ago, I got a call from the booth of the cinema across the street. The projectionist, an extra who had the honor of running that booth for four consecutive days starting that night, said he had heard strange noises from the lamphouse and was becoming a bit worried.
Helpful as I am, I went over as soon as I could, and quickly realised that the cooling fans above the pair of U3s (Nick, are you listening?) had worn ball bearings. Nothing serious but a bit annoying.
So did I tell him that? No, where was the fun in that? I told him that one of the bulbs was probably about to go out in flames any day now, and that he should be careful.
"So what do I do?" he asked.
"Nothing," I said. "If it goes, it goes. Just don't stay too close when it explodes because it might hurt your ears. It's a helluva blast."
"But... but I have to thread them, don't I? I have shows to run."
"Yeah, I guess you have to."
"So... when is it most likely to go, then?"
"Oh, when you ignite it, probably."
I went back to start my next show and immediately called some key colleagues the poor sod was bound to call to double-check me. I filled them in and they were only too happy to play.
And of course he called the others. They told him earnestly that yeah, it sounded like the bulb was about to explode, and yeah, it would be wise to keep some distance from the machines whenever possible.
For the next four days, he threaded the projectors with absolute dread, certain that this show was going to be his last, and just wanted to get out in one piece. We never told him, either.
Me, evil?
Posted by Tom Kroening (Member # 201) on 10-03-2000, 05:54 PM:
OOooo that was bad : P I had to change a bulb a few weeks ago. After I was finished I took an empty box and walked up to another manger. Just as i got up to him i fumbled a few times, hitting it with my foot and kicking it to the ground. At the same time i was turning around and bolted off. 
Posted by Leo Enticknap (Member # 534) on 10-03-2000, 06:18 PM:
At a previous workplace, we had an inexperienced projectionist who had to change a lamp. I'd gone through the procedure with her before, and she'd taken it all on board and made careful notes.Then I went on holiday and during the opening weekend of 'Speed' a lamp failed with anode pitting.
She did everything right - nearly. Told management she wasn't opening the lamphouse for at least half an hour. Wore full protective garb. Got old lamp into plastic tube and safely stored for later disposal. Fitted new lamp. Closed up lamphouse, audience are admitted, show starts.
A couple of minutes into the commercials, molten plastic can be seen dripping out of the bottom of the lamphouse. She'd left the plastic tube on the new bulb after screwing it into the cathode post...
Posted by Jesse Skeen (Member # 586) on 10-04-2000, 01:59 AM:
Hey Kevin what about that guy who sanded down all the platters to keep the film from sliding off?
Posted by Dave Williams (Member # 299) on 10-04-2000, 02:41 PM:
I have a manager call me and say that the sound is out of balance. I just finished balancing it two weeks ago. I go in and get some real information. It isnt out of balance, its turned up. WAY UP. i turned the volume back to where it is supposed to be.Can't I get something more challenging?
Dave
Posted by John Pytlak (Member # 331) on 10-04-2000, 03:27 PM:
Touring a newly opened multiplex, I noticed a young operator in training making up a print. He's wearing a dirty pair of woolen winter gloves. I ask him why, and he says that he was told to wear gloves when he handled film. Sad, but true! 
------------------
John P. Pytlak, Senior Technical Specialist
Worldwide Technical Services, Entertainment Imaging
Eastman Kodak Company
Research Labs, Building 69, Room 7419
Rochester, New York, 14650-1922 USA
Tel: 716-477-5325 Fax: 716-722-7243
E-Mail: john.pytlak@kodak.com
Posted by Rory Burke (Member # 512) on 10-04-2000, 03:53 PM:
hehehehe these stories remind me of some of the guys who I worked with. How bout those people who think everytime they call a tech it is because they are stupid and try everything they can with in their power to fix the situation before calling anyone. Oooooohhhhhhh here it goes. Take a christie platter brain or feed control plate. Well the moveable guide that controls the platter speed while it feeds on occasion get loose and the guide itself is tightened by removinig that black flat plate and tightening a screw from the top. I hope you all are following me.
It happens this head projectionist decides he wants to tighten ALL the guides on the brains for all the screens. <This is where God blessed comes in> He cant find the one screw that holds the black plate on and begins to drill a hole himself directly over the screw to be tightened. Well since he was lazy, and after drilling his fifth <20 plex> brain he finally calls me and asks me... "Is there a better way of doing this?"Rory
Posted by Brad Miller (Member # 2) on 10-04-2000, 03:58 PM:
John,I hope you at least corrected the fellow. It's MITTENS, not gloves. Gotta get rid of those pesky fingers that get in the way.
Posted by Ari Nordström (Member # 288) on 10-04-2000, 04:27 PM:
A couple of years ago an extra no longer employed by the company tried to clean a dusty print during rewind using a rag and plenty of water...
Posted by Greg Mueller (Member # 17) on 10-04-2000, 05:12 PM:
My shop was on an airport for several years and it use to be sop to send the "new kid" out to get some "prop wash" to clean the airplane props with------------------
Greg Mueller
Amateur Astronomer, Machinist, Filmnut
Posted by Mike Spaeth (Member # 524) on 10-04-2000, 05:23 PM:
With Blair Witch 2, we had this idea...send the new Usher-B all over the city to get a gallon of "film-stretcher" (since the image didn't fill the sides of the screen). Had a lot of fun with that one. Also, giving floor staff something to put in the "basement" (non-existant) - they'll look for it for hours before asking. Or you give them a bucket of water and ask them to fill the drinking fountain. They just dump it down the drain.
Posted by Mike Spaeth (Member # 524) on 10-04-2000, 05:31 PM:
sorry - meant the original BWP. not BW2.
Posted by Jim Ziegler (Member # 86) on 10-04-2000, 06:03 PM:
I can't wait for the next black and white film so I can send a new operator in a frantic search for a bottle of "technicolor"
Posted by Kevin Crawford (Member # 469) on 10-04-2000, 11:38 PM:
Well, JesseThat guy is with the company still. He still does Oakey, no offense to any of you backwoods folks, things to "fix" problems.
Posted by Phil Hill (Member # 371) on 10-05-2000, 12:45 AM:
Greg: Yeah, we used to do the "Prop Wash" thing too. A BLAST! (A pilot thing)
Another one of my favorites was sending the "funegy" (F*cking New Guy) out to get some new fallopian tubes for the amplifiers....
>>> Phil
Posted by Rory Burke (Member # 512) on 10-05-2000, 03:16 PM:
Reminds me of getting newbees fresh fom bootcamp while in the Marines. We would have them dress up in their dress blues<inspection ready> and send them to the roof for "Stealth watch" This was back in 1990 where the stealth fighter was new and mysterious still. We told them <newbees> that we were helping out by trying to verify that it trully was visually impossible to locate/identify. I think there are some real Stealth fighter fans out there who are misguidedly impressed. heheRory
Posted by Steve Scott (Member # 630) on 10-05-2000, 09:00 PM:
I am constantly inandated with our assistant managers, most of which shouldn't be near a projector, solving the problem of a DTS reader being routed to a dolby CP-500 reader by simply turning the 500 to SR type, rather than routing it to the DTS processor (with CDs loaded up) just below the 500.
WHY!!!!!!!!
Why can't they get through their heads the logic of the problem?!!!
I even asked one, WHOM HAD JUST BEEN "TRAINED" why this was happening. She replied, "What's SR?!"
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
Posted by Brad Miller (Member # 2) on 10-06-2000, 05:40 AM:
Better they ask "what's SR" than to just assume that Dolby SR stands for "Dolby with surround sound". I know of one person who thought that was what SR meant and would insist the movies be played in SR regardless of whether it was an "A" noise reduction print or not.
Posted by Jesse Skeen (Member # 586) on 10-07-2000, 01:32 AM:
When I train people I try to explain Dolby A and SR being like Dolby B and C-type noise reduction on cassette decks. But some people don't even understand THAT!!!
Of course that's not as big a problem now with most movies being in digital; someone told me a technician once said not to worry if the analog sound is working because nobody uses it anyway.
Posted by David M. Huskinson (Member # 608) on 10-11-2000, 12:13 PM:
I had a call at the Festival in Denver. It seems that the volume was bad in Theatre #6. They had the volume maxed on a CP-200 yet the auditorium volume was barely audible. It seems that one of the kids had replaced the exciter lamp on the AAII and had not aligned the slot on the bulb base to the key on the socket. I can't imagine what was going through his/her mind as they crammed the new bulb in when the old bulb just slid out!!
Posted by Scott Norwood (Member # 30) on 10-11-2000, 01:53 PM:
And, presumably, whoever replaced that exciter bulb didn't bother running Dolby Tone, either...
I once worked with someone who always flipped the switch on the exciter supply to "AC-Emergency" for no apparent reason. In a theatre with no digital sound capability. And, apparently, audiences either didn't notice or at least didn't complain about the nasty 60Hz hum.
I don't understand the "we only care about digital" argument. Good optical reproduction is _more_ important, since many films still don't have digital tracks (and, when they do, smaller films are often not quad-format), and all of the digital systems have some degree of flakiness about them, whereas optical reproduction is pretty stable. Not to mention that many theatres are still unequipped to reproduce digital tracks and that many digital tracks are unreproduceable after the prints are trashed by popcorn monkeys in many first-run gigaplexes.
Posted by Kevin Crawford (Member # 469) on 10-15-2000, 09:58 PM:
Just to add insult to injury. The guy that Jesse is refering to saying that analog is not important because there is digital, is the same guy that sanded the platters so the film would stop sliding off of them.I seem to recall that the platters were out of time, and would throw prints. Although he swore that he retimed them. BTW sanding the platters is the answer to that problem if any of you have that.
Good to finally see you here Dave. And I would think that they guy that crammed that exciter in there was not thinking. Panic is a beautiful thing, especially if you are not responsible for anything.
Posted by Brad Miller (Member # 2) on 10-15-2000, 11:14 PM:
You know, with all of the theaters closing down, it seems as if every theater actually could have digital on all screens. Take a company like UA for example (although I am going to pull numbers out of the air for this example). Typically on their older theaters they would have a couple of digital screens of one form or another, maybe a couple of stereo houses and some mono houses. If those digital players were taken to theaters that are NOT being closed down and still turn a profit, it would seem there would be plenty to go around. I guess the tech's payroll would be the only real issue here.
Posted by Tom Kroening (Member # 201) on 10-15-2000, 11:50 PM:
Thats exactly what is happening with our theatre chain. The older closing theatres are going to give their digital equipment to the other theatres that are running in SR. My theatre is all digital (well at least it is when another manager stops booking non DTS prints in DTS houses). SR doesn't sound bad, but if we are advertising digital the movie should play in digital.