Film-Tech Forum ARCHIVE: PANDORUM (2009)

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Posted by Frank Angel (Member # 248) on 09-28-2009, 01:43 PM:

CINEMA: Regal's Movies at Sheepshead Bay, Brooklyn NY
AUDITORIUM: 10
PRESENTATION: Film -- SRD, Scope
PRESENTATION QUALITY: burning 4000 hours on a 2000 hour bulb
MPAA - R (but I couldn't tell you why)
RATING: 1.5/5 (and that is only if you see it free)

You can hear this one barking in the vast cavernous halls of the abandoned space ship two hapless astronauts find themselves. In other words, IT'S A DOG.

(Mild spoiler)
These two astronauts awaken out of some kind of extended hibernation of 8 years or so that's gone terribly wrong. From then on, our hero has to RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN away from some pretty ugly mutants that evidently like to eat, guess what....ASTRONAUTS! Even more running ensues when he comes upon two other human inhabitants who take up the mobile excape from the nasty (but hardly ever shown in full light for more than 2 seconds) mutants.

The first half-hour is marginally interesting and you are curious about what happened to these guys, why they are where they are and why is the ship that looks big enough in the opening establishing shot to house all the people in Rhode Island, is seemingly empty. By the third reel, given the 3rd grade dialogue these guys are given to spout, you have no reason to hope they will outsmart and get away from the mutants, which, by the way, you've seen multiple times in many other horror movies. Nothing new here. In fact, I soon came to believe that the device of only letting you see the creatures in deep shadows or in speedy quick runs across the screen so fast that you could hardly see them, was done for the sole purpose of making sure you never got a good look at how pedestrian the creature design really was. By 2/3rs thru these endless chase scenes, you are WISHING the mutants would gobble these guys up and be done with it and let me go home.

It's billed as a sci-fi horror genre. The only horror is that you've lost 2hrs of you life for this drek.

Posted by Chris Hipp (Member # 1788) on 10-18-2009, 03:06 AM:

Eh, some people just aren't able to sit back and enjoy a movie. I found it to be a fine SciFi film.

Posted by Justin Gorka (Member # 3727) on 10-25-2009, 05:22 PM:

Ok, it's not brilliant but is worth a watch.