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Author Topic: The last person who posts here wins (part 3) Frank Angel Film God Posts: 5305 From: Brooklyn NY USA Registered: Dec 1999 posted 08-05-2011 08:09 AM                        I was going to take up hang gliding, but then thought, it's probably not a good idea to defy gravity....after all, it's the power that keeps the whole universe from blowing apart.  |  IP: Logged Joe Elliott Master Film Handler Posts: 497 From: Port Orange, Fl USA Registered: Oct 2006 posted 08-05-2011 12:25 PM                     Why is duct tape like the force? It is light on one side, dark on the other, and it binds the universe together.  |  IP: Logged Randy Stankey Film God Posts: 6539 From: Erie, Pennsylvania Registered: Jun 99 posted 08-05-2011 01:15 PM                     GAFFER'S TAPE!  |  IP: Logged William T. Parr Jedi Master Film Handler Posts: 823 From: Cedar Park, TX Registered: Nov 2000 posted 08-05-2011 02:15 PM                     You layin' da cuts straight sittin' on your ass while we floss and fly this mofo all over dis bitch.  |  IP: Logged Frank Angel Film God Posts: 5305 From: Brooklyn NY USA Registered: Dec 1999 posted 08-07-2011 07:50 AM                        A sign on the broken office copier: THE COPIER IS OUT OF ORDER! YES - We have called the service tech. NO - We don't know when he is coming. NO - We cannot fix it. NO - We do not know who broke it. YES - We are keeping it. NO -- We don't know what you are going to do now. THANK YOU  |  IP: Logged Paul Mayer Oh get out of it Melvin, before it pulls you under! Posts: 3836 From: Albuquerque, NM Registered: Feb 2000 posted 08-08-2011 02:52 AM                        Ah, a beautiful evening here in Sierra Vista, AZ. Driving back to Sin City tomorrow...  |  IP: Logged Frank Angel Film God Posts: 5305 From: Brooklyn NY USA Registered: Dec 1999 posted 08-08-2011 04:03 AM                        I don't mind coming to work, but this sitting around for eight hours waiting to go home is BS.  |  IP: Logged Joe Elliott Master Film Handler Posts: 497 From: Port Orange, Fl USA Registered: Oct 2006 posted 08-08-2011 10:38 AM                     You know, I've never really liked paying bills. I don't think I'm gonna do that, either.  |  IP: Logged Frank Angel Film God Posts: 5305 From: Brooklyn NY USA Registered: Dec 1999 posted 08-10-2011 07:54 PM                        Evidence has been found that William Tell and his family were avid bowlers. However, all the Swiss league records were unfortunately destroyed in a fire, and so we'll never know for whom the Tells bowled.  |  IP: Logged Paul Mayer Oh get out of it Melvin, before it pulls you under! Posts: 3836 From: Albuquerque, NM Registered: Feb 2000 posted 08-11-2011 07:11 PM                        "When throwing rocks at seabirds, I leave no tern unstoned."  |  IP: Logged Randy Stankey Film God Posts: 6539 From: Erie, Pennsylvania Registered: Jun 99 posted 08-11-2011 07:37 PM                     What's the difference between a watchmaker and a jailor? One sells watches. The other watches cells. ********** What's the difference between a band of pygmies and a women's track team? One is a bunch of cunning little runts...  |  IP: Logged Mike Blakesley Film God Posts: 12767 From: Forsyth, Montana Registered: Jun 99 posted 08-11-2011 08:27 PM                        What do you call a fish with no eyes? A "fsh" (OK this works better as a verbal joke, but whatever.)  |  IP: Logged Mark Lensenmayer Phenomenal Film Handler Posts: 1605 From: Upper Arlington, OH Registered: Sep 1999 posted 08-11-2011 09:27 PM                     Many many years ago, a North American Indian tribe found itself in with a dilemma. The tribe medicine man needed apples for his potions. Apples, apples and more apples were needed, but drought was at hand, and there were no apples to be found. The tribe to the west had many, many apples, but demanded cash for their Golden Delicious goodies. The tribal council met to discuss the financial issue. One of the tribal elders proposed a foot race among the men of the tribe. Bets could be placed on the runners, and the tribe would take a cut of the profits to purchase the valuable apples. Two weeks later, the 500 men of the tribe lined up at the starting line and that began the very first running of the Apple-less Indian 500. (Thanks to TOM SLICK and Jay Ward for that one.)  |  IP: Logged Tony Bandiera Jr Film God Posts: 3067 From: Moreland Idaho Registered: Apr 2004 posted 08-11-2011 09:34 PM                     Ugh.....  |  IP: Logged Paul Mayer Oh get out of it Melvin, before it pulls you under! Posts: 3836 From: Albuquerque, NM Registered: Feb 2000 posted 08-12-2011 04:37 PM                        Ah, prepping to return to WA state for a week of Regal installs in Kelso, Longview, and Vancouver. First flight I've had on WN in a while - will finally qualify for some free flights to use for quick getaways...  |  IP: Logged

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