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Author Topic: A nice family Christmas...minus one William Hooper Phenomenal Film Handler Posts: 1879 From: Mobile, AL USA Registered: Jun 99 posted 12-30-2005 01:57 AM                        quote: Phil Hill Many times bigotry, hate, intolerance, and the lack of compassion is passed on from generation-to-generation by people that have been "guided" (misguided) by religious or cultural teachings and it is too deeply imbedded in those that blindly follow the rhetoric...even at the expense of their own flesh and blood. There's such a disparity among the behavior of people even in the same religions or smaller cultures that you'll often have to look at something smaller. They behave like that because they're getting something out of it, a reward. It's either jollies of asserting control (you'll find that it's a reward for people who were deprived of control themselves), status in a small group that regards doing things like that as bestowing status, etc. Often it's an actual adrenaline rush that comes from making someone else miserable. It is broadly, & accurately, sadistic. It does travel from a path similar to the old saw about "he beats the wife, she beats the kids, the kids beat the dog (& then their kids & spouses). Its flaw is that if it turns from a reward to a liability like loss of status, or the target fails to respond in the way desired, it falls apart. That's why small acts of cruelty like that are generally confined to small social surroundings like the gatherings of a family or group where the behavior is supported by 'tradition'; if in public they run a risk of being disarmed. The folks who *do* go for bigger stakes in humiliation & cruelty by doing it to their trained targets in public bank on folks nearby not interfering, thus lending to their target the appearance that the behavior is appropriate, supported, deserved, etc. Next time you see a parent viciously whaling away at some poor kid in public, don't speak to the parent, who has devised a strategem for casting people who publicly disapprove as socially inappropriate 'interferers', speak directly to the kid & say something like "I wish you luck kid, decent people aren't as vicious as your (mother, father)". It will let the kid begin to think in terms of whether the treatment he or she's been getting is normal & socially approved, which is about the best that can be done in that situation (& quite a bit). Whenever you're considering a behavior that's an additional exertion, you always ask "What're they getting out of it?"  |  IP: Logged Robert E. Allen Phenomenal Film Handler Posts: 1078 From: Checotah, Oklahoma Registered: Jul 2002 posted 12-30-2005 02:27 AM                     Whatever that family was trying to accomplish with your friend they probably only succeeded in hurting him and alienating him which is just the opposite of what we should be celebrating at Christmas. I hope you are in a position to assure him he is of worth.  |  IP: Logged Leo Enticknap Film God Posts: 7474 From: Loma Linda, CA Registered: Jul 2000 posted 12-30-2005 05:36 AM                        quote: John Pytlak Most progressive companies today recognize the value of a diverse workforce, and that there is diversity among their loyal customers. Agreed entirely when 'diversity' means not behaving in any way negatively towards someone on the basis of the ethnicity/sexuality/religion/political views/family situation etc. But I do get sick and tired when people argue that these things entitle them to preferential treatment which is not offered to their colleagues who don't fall into a given category. Example: one of my colleagues is currently on maternity leave. We don't have the money both to cover the costs of that and to employ a replacement; and even if we did, it would probably be impossible to find someone with the skills needed who would be willing to take on the job for such a short period of time. The result? I've been working 60-70 hour weeks since last March, was not able to take my annual leave entitlement last year and almost certainly won't be able to this year. Although no-one's said so out loud, the implicit assumption of my colleagues and bosses is that because I'm male, single and have no dependants, that's fine and I shouldn't mind. Without straying into the political factors which I believe underlie this situation, what I'm trying to say is that positive discrimination aimed at helping one group of people often has a knock-on effect in the form of negative discrimination against others, and in my experience both are just as destructive. This is especially the case when the desire to construct a 'diverse' workforce results in someone who is best for the job but does not belong to an 'under represented' grouping getting passed over, of which I have noticed increasing instances.  |  IP: Logged Phil Hill I love my cootie bug Posts: 7595 From: Hollywood, CA USA Registered: Mar 2000 posted 12-30-2005 05:52 AM                  Hmmmm... Leo, if I understand the gist of your post, you're feeling put upon because you're getting fucked and not getting pregnant and not getting the associated benefits of being in that condition cuz you're a guy... I agree, you are! OBTW: There are tons of companies that have the same policies as KODAK regarding gay equality and all diversity. I wont bother to tie-up this thread and post and spout the individual links and selected text as John, but the lists (PDF format) can be found at the HRC Corporate Equality Index. While the reports are long (and boring), the lists are in the appendices.  |  IP: Logged John Pytlak Film God Posts: 9987 From: Rochester, NY 14650-1922 Registered: Jan 2000 posted 12-30-2005 10:43 AM                        Phil: You might recognize an old friend in the lower right hand corner of the photo on this link: Kodak Lambda Group Award Eric Rodli, the President of Kodak Entertainment Imaging, was the corporate management sponsor of the Kodak Lambda Group when they received the national Employee Resource Group Of The Year Award from Out&Equal. [ 12-30-2005, 05:09 PM: Message edited by: John Pytlak ]  |  IP: Logged Randy Stankey Film God Posts: 6539 From: Erie, Pennsylvania Registered: Jun 99 posted 12-30-2005 11:26 AM                     <sarcasm> But everybody "knows" that it was his mother who coddled him too much when he was a young child and his father who browbeat him as an adolescent who "made" him gay! It's all THEIR FAULT! </sarcasm> <hides under table>  |  IP: Logged

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