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Author
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Topic: Chain Letters
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
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posted 04-08-2003 04:07 PM
Rated G
Time Travel for Baby Boomers
Black and White
For older folks only (not meant to insult anyone) Under 40? You won't understand.
You could hardly see for all the snow, Spread the rabbit ears as
far as they go. Pull a chair up to the TV set, "Good night,
David; Good night, Chet." Dependin' on the channel you tuned You
got Rob and Laura - or Ward and June. It felt so good, felt so
right. Life looked better in black and white.
I Love Lucy, The Real McCoys Dennis the Menace, the Cleaver boys
Rawhide, Gunsmoke, Wagon Train Superman, Jimmy & Lois Lane.
Father Knows Best, Patty Duke Rin Tin Tin and Lassie too, Donna
Reed on Thursday night-- Life looked better in black and white.
I wanna go back to black and white. Everything always turned out
right. Simple people, simple lives Good guys always won the
fights. Now nothin is the way it seems In living color on the TV
screen. Too many murders, too much fight, I wanna go back to
black and white
In God they trusted, in bed they slept.A promise made was a
promise kept.They never cussed or broke their vows.They'd never
make the network now.But if I could, I'd rather be In a TV town
in '53.It felt so good, felt so right Life looked better in
black and white.
I'd trade all the channels on the satellite If I could just turn
back the clock tonight To when everybody knew wrong from right
Life was better in black and white! Pass this to someone and
brighten their day by helping them remember that life's simple
pleasures are the best. ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
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posted 04-09-2003 11:50 AM
Rated G ![[Smile]](smile.gif) Becky
The Bargain
============
During one of the many Reformation battles, a young soldier
found himself and his army being soundly defeated by the enemy.
He and his comrades hastily retreated from the battlefield in
defeat, running away in fear for their very lives.
The enemy gave chase. The young man ran hard and fast, full
of fear and desperation, and soon found himself cut off from
his comrades. The soldier eventually came upon a rocky ledge
containing a cave.
Knowing the enemy was close behind, and that he was exhausted
from the chase, he chose to hide there. After he crawled in,
he fell to his face in the darkness, desperately crying to
God to save him and protect him from his enemies. He made a
bargain with God. He promised that if God saved him, he would
serve Him for the remainder of his days.
When he looked up from his despairing plea for help, he saw a
spider beginning to weave its web at the entrance to the cave.
As he watched the delicate threads being slowly drawn across
the mouth of the cave, the young soldier pondered its irony.
He thought,
"I asked God for protection and deliverance, and He sent me
a spider instead. How can a spider save me?"
His heart was hardened, knowing the enemy would soon discover
his hiding place and kill him. Soon he did hear the sound
of his enemies, who were now scouring the area looking for
those in hiding.
One soldier with a gun slowly walked up to the cave's entrance.
As the young man crouched in the darkness, hoping to surprise
the enemy in a last-minute desperate attempt to save his own
life, he felt his heart pounding wildly out of control.
As the enemy cautiously moved forward to enter the cave, he came
upon the spider's web, which by now was completely strung across
the opening. He backed away and called out to a comrade,
"There can't be anyone in here. They would have had to break
this spider's web to enter the cave. Let's move on."
Years later, this young man, who made good his promise by
becoming a preacher and evangelist, wrote about that ordeal.
What he observed has stood by me in times of trouble, especially
during those times when everything seemed impossible:
"Where God is, a spider's web is as a stone wall.
Where God is not, a stone wall is as a spider's web."
Author Unknown
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
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posted 04-23-2003 11:07 AM
Rated G JJ on the Left Coast Holding the Fort.
I Can't Believe We Made It!
According to today's regulators and bureaucrats, those of us who were kids in the 30's, 40's, 50's, 60's, 70's or even the early 80's, probably shouldn't have survived.
Our baby cribs were covered with bright colored lead-based paint.
We had no childproof lids or locks on medicine bottles, doors, or cabinets, and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets.
Not to mention the risks we took hitchhiking .
As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags.
Riding in the back of a pickup truck on a warm day was always a special treat.
We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle. Horrors!!!
We weren't overweight because we were always outside playing.
We shared one soft drink with four friends , from one bottle, and no one actually died from this.
We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then rode dow the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the a few times, we learned to solve the problem.
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the street lights came on. No one was able to reach us all day. No cell phones. Unthinkable!
We did not have Playstations, Nintendo 64, X-Boxes,no video games at all, no 99 channels on cable, video tape movies, surround sound, personal cell phones, personal computers, or Internet chat rooms.
We had friends! We went outside and found them.
We played dodge ball, and sometimes, the ball would really hurt. We fell out of trees, got cut and broke bones and teeth, and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.
They were accidents. No one was to blame but us. Remember accidents?
We had fights and punched each other and got black and blue and learned to get over it.
We made up games with sticks and tennis balls and, although we were told it would happen, we did not put out any eyes.
We rode bikes or walked to a friend's home and knocked on the door, or rang the bell or just walked in and talked to them.
Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment.
Some students weren't as smart as others, so they failed a grade and were held back to repeat the same grade. Horrors!
Tests were not adjusted for any reason.
Our actions were our own. Consequences were expected.
The idea of parents bailing us out if we got in trouble in school or broke a law was unheard of.
They actually sided with the school or the law. Imagine that!
This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers, and inventors, ever.
We had freedom, failure, success, and responsibility --- and we learned how to deal with it. And you're one of them! Congratulations.
Please pass this on to others who have had the luckto grow up as kids before lawyers and government regulated our lives for our own good !!!
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
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posted 04-27-2003 08:30 PM
Rated G
Some Things We Keep
I grew up in the forties and fifties with practical parents -- a Mother,God love her,who washed aluminum foil after she cooked in it,then reused it.A Father who was happier getting old shoes fixed than buying new ones.
Their marriage was good, their dreams focused. Their best friends lived barely a wave away.I can see them now, Dad in trousers,tee shirt and a hat and Mom in a house dress,lawn mower in one hand, dishtowel in the other......It was the time for fixing things -- a curtain rod, the kitchen radio, screen door, the oven door,the hem in a dress. Things we keep. It was a way of life,and sometimes it made me crazy.
All that re-fixing, reheating, renewing, I wanted just once to be wasteful.Waste meant affluence. Throwing things away meant there'd always be more.
But then my Mother died, and on that clear summer's night,in the warmth of the hospital room,I was struck with the pain of learning that sometimes there isn't any 'more.'
Sometimes, what we care about most gets all used up and goes away
..........Never to return.
So ........while we have it ....... ................It's best we love it .....................and care for it .........and fix it when it's broken .........and heal it when it's sick.
This is true ..........for marriage .....................and old cars and children with bad report cards ..............and dogs with bad hips..........and aging parents.....and grandparents.
We keep them because they are worth it,because we are worth it.
Some things we keep. Like a best friend that moved away -- or -- a classmate we grew up with.
There are just some things that make life important.......people we know who are special......And so, we keep them close!
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
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posted 04-30-2003 03:54 PM
Rated G Women Will Love This
One afternoon a man came home from work to find total mayhem in his house. His three children were outside, still in their pajamas,playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard. The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house. Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess.
A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall. In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing. In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table,and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door.
He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she may be ill, or that something serious had happened.
He found her lounging in the bedroom, still curled in the bed in her pyjamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked,"What happened here today?"
She again smiled and answered, "You know every day when you come home from work and you ask me what in the world did I do today?"
"Yes" was his incredulous reply.
She answered, "Well, today I didn't do it."
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
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posted 05-21-2003 08:31 AM
Rated G Brains for Sale
In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their family member lay gravely ill
Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber.
"I'm afraid I'm the bearer of bad news,"he said as he surveyed the worried faces.
"The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant. It's an experimental procedure, very risky but it is the only hope."
"Insurance will cover the procedure, but you will have to pay for the brain yourselves
The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a great length of time, someone asked, "Well, how much does a brain cost?"
The doctor quickly responded, "$5,000 for a male brain, and $200 for a female brain."
The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked. A man, unable to control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask, "Why is the male brain so much more?"
The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and explained to the entire group,"It's just standard pricing procedure.We have to mark down the price of the female brains,because they've actually been used."
SEND THIS TO A SMART WOMAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND TO THE MEN YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT.
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
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posted 06-05-2003 10:51 AM
Rated G JJ on Left Coast
Subject: 809 Area Code
We actually received a call last week from the 809 area code. The woman said "Hey, this is Karen. Sorry I missed you--get back to us quickly. Have something important to tell you." Then she repeated a phone number beginning with 809. We didn't respond.
Then this week, we received the following email:
Subject: DON'T EVER DIAL AREA CODE 809, 284 AND 876 THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT INFORMATION PROVIDED TO US BY AT&T. DON'T EVER DIAL AREA CODE 809
This one is being distributed all over the US. This is pretty scary, especially given the way they try to get you to call. Be sure you read this and pass it on to all your friends and family so they don't get scammed!
MAJOR SCAM:
Don't respond to Emails, phone calls,or web pages which tell you to call an "809" area Phone Number.
This is a very important issue of Scam Busters
because it alerts you to a scam that is spreading *extremely* quickly, can easily cost you $2400 or more, and is difficult to avoid unless you are aware of it.
We'd like to thank Verizon for bringing this scam to our attention. This scam has also been identified by the National Fraud Information Center and is costing victims a lots of money.
There are lots of different permutations of this scam.
HERE'S HOW IT WORKS:
You will receive a message on your answering machine or your pager,which asks you to call a number beginning with area code 809.The reason you're asked to call varies.It can be to receive information about a family member who has been ill, to tell you someone has been arrested,died,to let you know you have won a wonderful prize,etc.In each case,you are told to call the 809 number right away.
Since there are so many new area codes these days,people unknowingly return these calls.
If you call from the US, you will apparently be charged $2425 per-minute. Or,you'll get a long recorded message. The point is, they will try to keep you on the phone as long as possible to increase the charges. Unfortunately, when you get your phone bill,you'll often be charged more than $24,100.00.
WHY IT WORKS:
The 809 area code is located in the British Virgin Islands (The Bahamas).The 809 area code can be used as a "pay-per-call" number,similar to 900 numbers in the US. Since 809 is not in the US,it is not covered by U.S. regulations of 900 numbers,which require that you be notified and warned of charges and rates involved when you call a pay-per-call" number.
There is also no requirement that the company provide a time period during which you may terminate the call without being charged. Further, where as many U.S.homes that have 900 number blocking to avoid these kinds of charges,do not work in preventing calls to the 809 area code.
We recommend that no matter how you get the message,if you are asked to call a number with an 809 area code that you don't recognize,just disregard the message.
Be wary of email,or calls,asking you to call an 809 area code number.It's important to prevent becoming a victim of this scam,since trying to fight the charges afterwards can become a real nightmare.That's because you did actually make the call. If you complain,both your local phone company and your long distance carrier will not want to get involved and will most likely tell you that they are simply providing the billing for the foreign company.You'll end up dealing with a foreign company that argues they have done nothing wrong.
Please forward this entire message to your friends,family and colleagues to help them become aware of this scam.
Sandi Van Handel AT&T Field Service Manager (920)687-9044
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
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posted 06-09-2003 03:33 PM
Ratd G Nan in Rhode Island
NAIL IN THE FENCE
A Good Story for Great Friends..... Make sure you read all he way down to the last sentence!
There once was a little girl who had a bad temper. Her mother gave her a bag of nails and told her that every time she lost her temper, she must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.
The first day the girl had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as she learned to control her anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. She discovered it was easier to hold her temper than to drive those nails into the fence.
Finally the day came when the girl didn't lose her temper at all. She told her mother about it and the mother suggested that the girl now pull out one nail for each day that she was able to hold her temper. The day passed and the young girl was finally able to tell her mother that all he nails were gone. The mother took her daughter by the hand and led her to the fence.
She said, "You have done well, my daughter, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one." You can put a knife in a person and draw it out. It won't matter how many times you say "I'm sorry", the wound is still there. A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one.
Friends are very rare jewels, indeed. They make you smile and encourage you to succeed. They lend an ear, they share words of praise and they always want to open their hearts to us It's National Friendship week.
Show your friends how much you care. Send this to everyone you consider a FRIEND, even if it means sending it back to the person who sent it to you.
If it comes back to you, then you'll know you have a circle of friends.
Happy Friendship week! You are my friend and I am honored.
Now send this to every friend you have! And to your family.
Please forgive me if I have ever left a hole in your fence.
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
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posted 06-10-2003 12:03 PM
Rated G
Andy Borowitz is a funny guy. For those of you that are retired, you see him every once in a while in themorning on CNN as one of the commentators on currentevents. He used to be a writer on various comedy shows. Below is an example from his free newsletter which I thought you would enjoy. You can also go to his web site www.Borowitzreport.com to see more.
-"Borowitzreport.com" <Andy@Borowitzreport.com>
wrote:
Breaking News
PETERSON PLEADS TEMPORARY BLONDNESS
Perpetually Changing Hairdo Could Deadlock Trial,Lawyers Hope In a high-risk gambit to gain their client's acquittal, lawyers for Scott Peterson today entered a plea of "temporary blondness" in the opening phase of his Modesto murder trial.
The rarely used legal strategy is designed to introduce doubt into the minds of the jurors by having the defendant dye his hair a different color every time he appears in court.
By coloring, cutting and otherwise coiffing Mr.Peterson's hair so that his appearance changes drastically on a daily basis, his legal teamhopes to confuse and disorient the jury to the point that it becomes deadlocked.
Adding to the jury's potential confusion is the fact that, while Mr. Peterson's hair seems to be turning steadily darker,the hair of his former mistress, Amber Frey, seems to be growing increasingly yellow.
But Dr. Kenneth Dupree, a professor at the University of MinnesotaSchool of Law, said that by entering a plea of temporary blondness Mr.Peterson's lawyers are employing the legal equivalent of a "Hail Mary" pass in football.
"Clearly, they are trying to draw the jury's attention to his hair color and away from other matters, such as what he was doing buying a big storage drum and huge bags of cement," Dr. Dupree said.
At a minimum, Dr. Dupree said, entering a plea of temporary blondness could buy the defense some time while the Petersonteam's private investigator, O.J. Simpson, continues to look for the real killers of Mr. Peterson's wife.
The defense team said that as of today Mr. Simpson had made "significant progress" in obtaining evidence that could link the murder to Colombian drug lords, Patsy Ramsey, and/or Saddam Hussein.
**** AMAZON SHIPS "WHO MOVED MY SOAP" TODAY! ****
Finally, it's in stock and available: "Who Moved My Soap?
The CEO'sGuide to Surviving in Prison" by Andy Borowitz can be ordered at
Amazon.com today for immediate shipping. Order nowand save 20% --
Andy's new book for only $8.76. Go to Amazon.com or click on the book link above and get your copy today.
"The funniest business-book title we've come across in a while is from humorist Andy Borowitz: 'Who Moved My Soap?
The CEO's Guide to Surviving in Prison." -- The Washington Post
"Very funny." -- Publishers Weekl "A strong candidate for our book of the year award." The Guardian (U.K.)
**** BOROWITZ IN CHICAGO! ****
Andy Borowitz and the Who Moved My Soap World Tourcome to Chicago the evening of June 12 at the University of Chicago Graduate School of Business. Open to the public; for info, call 312-226-9680 or contact Ddamyen@alumni.uchicago.edu
The Borowitz Report <http://www.borowitzreport.com>
Waste Someone's Time: Forward to a Friend.
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
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posted 06-14-2003 03:44 PM
Rated G Diane in Las Vegas
"Heart Test"
As she stood in front of her 5th grade class on the very first day of school, she told the children an untruth. Like most teachers, she looked at her students and said that she loved them all the same. However, that was impossible, because there in the front row, slumped in his seat, was a little boy named Teddy Stoddard.
Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed that he Did not play well with the other children, that his clothes were messy and that he constantly needed a bath. In addition, Teddy could be unpleasant.
It got to the point where Mrs. Thompson would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's and then putting a big "F" at the top of his papers.
At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to review each child's past records and she put Teddy's off until last. However, when she reviewed his file, she was in for a surprise.
Teddy's first grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is a bright child with a ready laugh. He does his work neatly and has good manners... he is a joy to be around.."
His second grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is an excellent student, well liked by his classmates, but he is troubled because his mother has a terminal illness and life at home must be a struggle."
His third grade teacher wrote, "His mother's death has been hard on him. He tries to do his best, but his father doesn't show much interest and his home life will soon affect him if some steps aren't taken."
Teddy's fourth grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is withdrawn and doesn't Show much interest in school. He doesn't have many friends and he sometimes sleeps in class."
By now, Mrs. Thompson realized the problem and she was ashamed of herself. She felt even worse when her students brought her Christmas presents, wrapped in beautiful ribbons and bright paper, except for Teddy's. His present was clumsily wrapped in the heavy, brown paper That he got from a grocery bag Mrs. Thompson took pains to open it in the middle of the other presents. Some of the children started to laugh when she found a rhinestone bracelet with some of the stones missing, and a bottle that was one-quarter full of perfume.. But she stifled the children's laughter when she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet was, putting it on, and dabbing some of the perfume on her wrist. Teddy Stoddard stayed after school that day just long enough to say, "Mrs. Thompson, today you smelled just like my Mom used to." After the children left, she cried for at least an hour.
On that very day, she quit teaching reading, writing and arithmetic. Instead, she began to teach children. Mrs. Thompson paid particular attention to Teddy. As she worked with him, his mind seemed to come alive. The more she encouraged him, the faster he responded. By the end of the year, Teddy had become one of the smartest children in the class and, despite her lie that she would love all the children the same, Teddy became one of her "teacher's pets.."
A year later, she found a note under her door, from Teddy, telling* her that she was still the best teacher he ever had in his whole life.
Six years went by before she got another note from Teddy. He then wrote that he had finished high school, third in his class, and she was still the best teacher he ever had in life.
Four years after that, she got another letter, saying that while things had been tough at times, he'd stayed in school, had stuck with it, and would soon graduate from college with the highest of honors. He assured Mrs. Thompson that she was still the best and favorite teacher he had ever had in his whole life.
Then four more years passed and yet another letter came. This time he explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he decided to go a little further. The letter explained that she was still the best and favorite teacher he ever had. But now his name was a little longer.... The letter was signed, Theodore F. Stoddard, MD.
The story does not end there. You see, there was yet another letter that spring. Teddy said he had met this girl and was going to be married. He explained that his father had died a couple of years ago and he was wondering if Mrs. Thompson might agree to sit at the wedding in the place that was usually reserved for the mother of the groom.
Of course, Mrs. Thompson did. And guess what? She wore that bracelet, the one with several rhinestones missing. Moreover, she made sure she was wearing the perfume that Teddy remembered his mother wearing on their last Christmas together.
They hugged each other, and Dr. Stoddard whispered in Mrs. Thompson's ear, "Thank you Mrs. Thompson for* believing in me. Thank you so much for making me feel important and showing me that I could make a difference."
Mrs. Thompson, with tears in her eyes, whispered back. She said, "Teddy, you have it all wrong. You were the one who taught me that I could make a difference. I didn't know how to teach until I met you."
(For you that don't know, Teddy Stoddard is the Dr. at Iowa Methodist in Des Moines that has the Stoddard Cancer Wing.)
Warm someone's heart today. . . pass this along. I love this story so very much, I cry every time I read it. Just try to make a difference in someone's life today? tomorrow? just "do it".
Random acts of kindness, I think they call it?
"Believe in Angels, then return the favor"
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
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posted 07-01-2003 12:06 PM
Rated G
Read this line very slowly and let it sink in...
If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.
Pass this message to seven people except you and me. You will receive a miracle tomorrow (just do it)!
THE BRICK
A young and successful executive was traveling down a neighborhood street, going a bit too fast in his new Jaguar. He was watching for kids darting out from between parked cars and slowed down when he thought he saw something. As his car passed, no children appeared. Instead, a brick smashed into the Jag's side door!He slammed on the brakes and backed the Jag back to the spot wherethe brick had been thrown.The angry driver then jumped out of the car, grabbed the nearest kidand pushed him up against a parked car shouting, "What was that all about and who are you? Just what the heck are you doing? That's a new car and
that brick you threw is going to cost a lot of money. Why did you do it?"
The young boy was apologetic. "Please, mister...please, I'm sorry but I didn t know what else to do," He pleaded. "I threw the brick because no one else would stop..." with tears dripping down his face and off his chin,the youth pointed to a spot just around a parked car. "It's my brother," he said. "He rolled off the curb and fell out of his wheelchair and I can't lift him up." Now sobbing, the boy asked the stunned executive, "Would you please help me get him back into his wheelchair? He's hurt and he's too heavy for me." Moved beyond words, the driver tried to swallow the rapidly swelling lump in his throat. He hurriedly lifted the handicapped boy back into the wheelchair then took out his fancy handkerchief and dabbed at the fresh scrapes and cuts.A quick look told him everything was going to be okay."Thank
you and may God bless you," the grateful child told the stranger.Too shook up for words,the man simply watched the boy push his wheelchair-bound brother down the sidewalk toward their home It was along, slow walk back to the Jaguar. The damage was very noticeable, but the driver never bothered to repair the dented side door. He kept the dent there to remind him of this message "Don't go through life so fast that someone has to throw a brick at you to get your attention!" God whispers in our souls and speaks to our hearts. Sometimes when we don'thave time to listen, He has to throw a brick at us. It's our choiceto listen or not.
Thought for the Day:
If God had a refrigerator, your picture would be on it.
If He had a wallet, your photo would be in it.
He sends you flowers every spring.
He sends you a sunrise every morning. Face it, friend - He is crazy about you!
Send this to every "beautiful person" you wish to bless, and return it to the person who sent it to you. God didn't promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow, sun without rain, but He did promise, strength for the day, comfort for the tears, and light for the way. ![[thumbsup]](graemlins/thumbsup.gif)
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
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posted 07-15-2003 09:37 AM
Rated G
Why go to Church?
Church - What is it good for?
A Church goer wrote a letter to the editor of a newspaper
and complained that it made no sense to go to church every Sunday.
"I've gone for 30 years now," he wrote, "and in that time I haveheard something like 3,000 sermons. But for the life of me,I can't remember a single one of them. So, I think I'm wastingmy time and the pastors are wasting theirs by giving sermons at all."
This started a real controversy in the "Letters to the Editor"
column, much to the delight of the editor.
It went on for weeks until someone wrote this clincher:
I've been married for 30 years now. In that time my wife
has cooked some 32,000 meals. But for the life of me,
I cannot recall the entire menu for a single one of those meals.
But I do know this: They all nourished me and gave me the strengthI needed to do my work. If my wife had not cooked these meals, I would be physically dead today. Likewise, if I had not gone tochurch for nourishment, I would be spiritually dead today!"
When you are DOWN to nothing.... God is UP to something!
Faith sees the invisible,believes the incredible and receives the impossible! Thank God for our physical AND our spiritual nourishment!
All right ... now that you're done reading ...send it on!!! I think everyone should read this!! "When Satan is knocking at your door, simply say,"Jesus, could you get that for me?!"
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
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posted 07-18-2003 01:16 AM
Rated G
Love him or loath him, he nailed this one right on the head.............
By Rush Limbaugh:
I think the vast differences in compensation between
victims of the September 11 casualty and those who die
serving the country in Uniform are profound. No one
is really talking about it either, because you just
don't criticize anything having to do with September
11. Well, I just can't let the numbers pass by
because it says something really disturbing about the
entitlement mentality of this country. If you lost a
family member in the September 11 attack, you're going
to get an average of $1,185,000. The range is a
minimum guarantee of $250,000, all the way up to $4.7
million.
If you are a surviving family member of an American
soldier killed in action, the first check you get is a
$6,000 direct death benefit, half of which is taxable.
Next, you get $1,750 for burial costs. If you are
the surviving spouse, you get $833 a month until you
remarry. And there's a payment of $211 per month for
each child under 18. When the child hits 18, those
payments come to a screeching halt.
Keep in mind that some of the people who are getting
an average of $1.185 million up to $4.7 million are
complaining that it's not enough. Their deaths were
tragic, but for most, they were simply in the wrong
place at the wrong time. Soldiers put themselves in
harms way FOR ALL OF US, and they and their families
know the dangers.
We also learned over the weekend that some of the
victims from the Oklahoma City bombing have started an organization asking for the same deal that the
September 11 families are getting. In addition to
that, some of the families of those bombed in the
embassies are now asking for compensation as well.
You see where this is going, don't you? Folks, this
is part and parcel of over 50 years of entitlement
politics in this country. It's just really sad. Every time a pay raise comes up for the military, they usually receive next to nothing of a raise. Now the green machine is in combat in the Middle East while
their families have to survive on food stamps and live
in low-rent housing. Make sense?
However, our own U.S. Congress just voted themselves a raise, and many of you don't know that they only have
to be in Congress one time to receive a pension that
is more than $15,000 per month, and most are now equal to being millionaires plus. They also do not receive
Social Security on retirement because they didn't have
to pay into the system.
If some of the military people stay in for 20 years
and get out as an E-7, you may receive a pension of
$1,000 per month, and the very people who placed you
in harm's way receive a pension of $15,000 per month.
I would like to see our elected officials pick up a
weapon and join ranks before they start cutting out
benefits and lowering pay for our sons and daughters
who are now fighting.
"When do we finally do something about this?" If this
doesn't seem fair to you, it is time to forward this
to as many people as you can. If you're interested there
is more.......................
This must be a campaign issue in 2004. Keep it going.
SOCIAL SECURITY: (This is worth the read. It's short
and to the point.) Many of you may have already seen this part, so it will be a depressing reminder....
Perhaps we are asking the wrong questions during
election years. Our Senators and Congressmen do not
pay into Social Security. Many years ago they voted
in their own benefit plan. In more recent years, no
congressperson has felt the need to change it. For
all practical purposes their plan works like this:
When they retire, they continue to draw the same pay
until they die, except it may increase from time to
time for cost of living adjustments. For example,
former Senator Byrd and Congressman White and their
wives may expect to draw $7,800,000 - that's Seven
Million, Eight Hundred Thousand), with their wives
drawing $275,000.00 during the last years of their
lives.
This is calculated on an average life span for each.
Their cost for this excellent plan is $00.00. These
little perks they voted for themselves is free to
them. You and I pick up the tab for this plan.
The funds for this fine retirement plan come directly
from the General Fund--our tax dollars at work! >From our own Social Security Plan, which you and I pay (or have paid) into-- every payday until we retire (which amount is matched by our employer) --we can expect to get an average $1,000 per month after retirement. Or, in other words, we would have to collect our average of
$1,000 monthly benefits for 68 years and one month to
equal Senator Bill Bradley's benefits!
Social Security could be very good if only one small
change were made. And that change would be to jerk
the Golden Fleece Retirement Plan from under the
Senators and Congressmen. Put them into the Social
Security plan with the rest of us and then watch how
fast they would fix it.
If enough people receive this, maybe a seed of
awareness will be planted and maybe good changes will
evolve. WE, each one of us... can make a difference..
How many people can YOU send this to? 1600 +
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
|
posted 07-29-2003 07:36 AM
Rated G
A well-known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $20.00 bill. In the room of 200,he asked, "Who would like this $20 bill?" Hands started going up.
He said, "I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this. He proceeded to crumple the $20 dollar bill up.
He then asked, "Who still wants it?" Still the hands were up in
the air.
Well, he replied, "What if I do this?" And he dropped it on the
ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He
picked it up, now crumpled and dirty. "Now, who still wants it?"
Still the hands went into the air.
My friends,we have all learned a very valuable lesson.No matter
what I did to the money,you still wanted it because it did not
decrease in value.It was still worth $20.
Many times in our lives,we are dropped,crumpled,and ground
into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way.We feel as though we are worthless.But no matter what has happened or what will happen,you will never lose your value.Dirty or clean,crumpled or finely creased,you are still priceless to those who DO LOVE you.
The value of our lives comes not in what we do or who we know, but by WHO WE ARE.
You are special - Don't EVER forget it."
If you do not pass this on,you may never know the lives it
touches,the hurting hearts it speaks to,or the hope that it can bring.
Count your blessings, not your problems.
Never be afraid to try something new.
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
|
posted 08-08-2003 04:57 PM
Rated G ![[Eek!]](eek.gif)
WRITE IT ON THE BACK OF YOUR ENVELOPES
You may have heard in the news that a couple of Post Offices in Texas have been forced to take down small posters that say"IN GOD WE TRUST."
The law, they say, is being violated. It is something silly about electioneering posters (is God running for office)?
Anyway, I heard proposed on a radio station show, that we all write "IN GOD WE 'TRUST" on the back of all our mail. After all, that is our national motto, and it's on all the money we use to buy those stamps. I think it is a wonderful idea.
We must take back our nation from all the people that think that anything that offends them should be removed.
If you like this idea, please pass it on, and DO IT. The idea of writing or stamping "IN GOD WE TRUST" on our envelopes sounds good to me.
It has been reported that 86% of Americans believe in God. Therefore, I have a very hard time understanding why there is such a mess about having "In God We Trust" on our money and having God in the pledge of Allegiance.
Could it be that we just need to take action and tell the 14% to sit down and shut up?
If you agree, pass this on, if not delete.
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