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Author Topic: The last person who posts here wins (part 2) Randy Stankey Film God Posts: 6539 From: Erie, Pennsylvania Registered: Jun 99 posted 06-20-2011 05:32 PM                     "Down the tubes..." I hear that one a lot. People say, "Ah, the country is going down the tubes." What tubes? Have you seen any tubes? Where are these tubes? And where do they go? And how come there's more than one tube? It would seem to me, one country, one tube. But does every state, all of a sudden, have to have its own tube now? One tube is all you need. But a tube that big? Somebody would have seen it by now. "Hey Joey! Get a load of these freakin' tubes!"  |  IP: Logged John Wilson Film God Posts: 5438 From: Sydney, Australia. Registered: Dec 1999 posted 06-20-2011 07:55 PM                     The Tubes are here.  |  IP: Logged Frank Angel Film God Posts: 5305 From: Brooklyn NY USA Registered: Dec 1999 posted 06-20-2011 10:14 PM                        What are "hot cakes" and how is it that people want everything to sell like them?  |  IP: Logged John Wilson Film God Posts: 5438 From: Sydney, Australia. Registered: Dec 1999 posted 06-20-2011 10:35 PM                     The Hotcakes are here.  |  IP: Logged Mike Blakesley Film God Posts: 12767 From: Forsyth, Montana Registered: Jun 99 posted 06-21-2011 10:56 AM                        We have no old people any more. We've taken them all away, and brought in these "senior citizens."  |  IP: Logged Frank Angel Film God Posts: 5305 From: Brooklyn NY USA Registered: Dec 1999 posted 06-22-2011 06:30 PM                        And where are the Junior Citizens?  |  IP: Logged Paul Mayer Oh get out of it Melvin, before it pulls you under! Posts: 3836 From: Albuquerque, NM Registered: Feb 2000 posted 06-26-2011 03:15 PM                        Survived the Laughlin install. Must say that Laughlin Stadium 9 Cinemas screen #2 (a former THX house) turned out as one of the best sounding rooms I've heard in a long time. Ken Williams did the tuning - absolutely outstanding!  |  IP: Logged Mitchell Dvoskin Phenomenal Film Handler Posts: 1869 From: West Milford, NJ, USA Registered: Jan 2001 posted 06-28-2011 11:26 AM                     46  |  IP: Logged Greg Anderson Jedi Master Film Handler Posts: 766 From: Ogden Valley, Utah Registered: Nov 1999 posted 06-28-2011 12:49 PM                        Improving my post count for no good reason.  |  IP: Logged William T. Parr Jedi Master Film Handler Posts: 823 From: Cedar Park, TX Registered: Nov 2000 posted 06-28-2011 04:38 PM                     Me too Greg. Me too.  |  IP: Logged Mike Blakesley Film God Posts: 12767 From: Forsyth, Montana Registered: Jun 99 posted 06-28-2011 10:03 PM                        Al Sleet here, your hippy-dippy weatherman, with all the hippy dippy weather, man! Brought to you by Parsons Pest Control. Do you have termites, waterbugs and roaches? Parsons will get rid of the termites and waterbugs, and help you smoke the roaches! Temperature is 88 degrees at the airport....which is stupid, 'cause I don't know anybody who lives at the airport. I'd like to apologize to the former residents of Hackensack, New Jersey, for the weather over the weekend. Especially if you watched my show on Friday. Caught them cats nappin', man. Now if you'll take a look at our national weather map...you'll see that we don't have one! So, try to picture last night's map...in your mind. Remember all them lines and numbers. Weather was dominated by a large Canadian low...which is not to be confused with a Mexican high! Tonight's forecast: Dark. Continued mostly dark tonight, turning to widely scattered light in the morning, man.  |  IP: Logged Greg Anderson Jedi Master Film Handler Posts: 766 From: Ogden Valley, Utah Registered: Nov 1999 posted 06-29-2011 03:45 PM                        I still don't have a good reason.  |  IP: Logged Frank Angel Film God Posts: 5305 From: Brooklyn NY USA Registered: Dec 1999 posted 06-29-2011 03:50 PM                        And tomorrow we will have a cooler air mass meeting this much large warm ass of air from the south.  |  IP: Logged Tony Bandiera Jr Film God Posts: 3067 From: Moreland Idaho Registered: Apr 2004 posted 06-29-2011 05:59 PM                     92 to go....whoopie.  |  IP: Logged Frank Angel Film God Posts: 5305 From: Brooklyn NY USA Registered: Dec 1999 posted 06-30-2011 09:36 AM                        For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt!" Well, thanks to the following genealogy, you can now respond with intellectual certainty. Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack. In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and, because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock. Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla and Giva, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt. Now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt," you can knowingly correct them. Sincerely, Crock O. Schitt  |  IP: Logged

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