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Author Topic: Gay's Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 11-11-2005 07:57 AM                        Rated G Talking about the elections...Jay Leno had this to say tonight... "Well, Texas has voted to ban same sex marriages...Since gays have been banned to marry in Texas...They have started a new battle cry in the gay community...'Remember Al-and-Mo, Remember Al-and-Mo!'"  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 12-21-2005 07:46 AM                        Rated R 2 gays out for a walk in the country when all of a sudden one of them stops. 'What's the matter?' 'Oh, I must have a poo, I'll just nip behind those bushes' Suddenly his chum hears screaming coming from behind the very bushes where his chum is who jumps out shouting 'I've had an abortion! I've had an abortion! and breaks down crying. His friend says that's impossible and goes round the bushes to have a close look. He soon comes back to his sobbing chum, puts his arm gently around his shoulders and says..... 'You daft bugger! you've shit on a frog!'  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 01-06-2006 08:42 AM                        Rated G Elaine On gays in the military: Conservatives are worried straight men might become targets of sexual overtures. In other words, men in combat might have to face the same hell that's confronted secretaries and waitresses for generations.  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 02-11-2006 09:08 PM                        Rated G Spaz The Frog, The Bear, & The Rabbit Once upon a time, there was a frog who lived in a lake all by himself. He had been given special powers by a local witch. One day, he finally ventured out of the lake to get his first glimpse of the world outside. The first thing he saw was a bear chasing a rabbit. So,he called out to them and asked them to stop. Then he said to them, "I am a magical frog, and since you are the first two animals I have ever seen, I am going to grant you both three wishes. You will each take turns using them, and you have to use them now. The bear (being greedy) went first. "I would like for every bear in this forest to be female except for me." A magical sound and it was done. Then the rabbit. "I would like a helmet." This confused both the frog and the bear, but after a magical sound. There was a helmet. It was the bear's turn again. "I would like for every bear in the neighboring forest to be female." A magical sound and it was done. The rabbit went again. "I would like a motorcycle." Both the frog and the bear wondered why the rabbit didn't just ask for a lot of money with which he could buy himself a motorcycle, but after a magical sound there was a motorcycle. The bear took his last wish. "I would like for all the bears in the world to be female except for me." A magical sound and it was done. The rabbit then put on his helmet, started up the motorcycle, and said, "I wish the bear was gay," and took off like a bat out of hell.  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 02-18-2006 10:04 AM                        Rated G Elton John has filed for divorce. He found out his husband was having sex behind his back.  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 10-18-2006 10:16 AM                        Rated G Ms Martha A homosexual sentenced to death in the electric chair: Warden: "Any last request?" Homo: "Yes Warden, can I blow the fuse?" [ 11-21-2006, 08:11 AM: Message edited by: Bob Maar ]  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 10-25-2006 04:01 PM                        Rated G Ed in Aurora, Ont. Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party. After several drinks, one of the men had to use the rest room. Those who remained talked about their kids. The first guy said, "My son is my pride and joy. He started working at a successful company at the bottom of the barrel. He studied Economics and Business Administration and soon began to climb the corporate ladder and now he's the president of the company. He became so rich that he gave his best friend a top of the line Mercedes for his birthday." The second guy said, "Darn, that's terrific! My son is also my pride and joy. He started working for a big airline, then went to flight school to become a pilot. Eventually he became a partner in the company,where he owns the majority of its assets He's so rich that he gave his best friend a brand new jet for his birthday." The third man said: "Well, that's terrific! My son studied in the best universities and became an engineer. Then he started his own construction company and is now a multimillionaire. He also gave away something very nice and expensive to his best friend for his birthday: A 30,000 square foot mansion." The three friends congratulated each other just as the fourth returned from the restroom and asked: "What are all the congratulations for?" One of the three said: "We were talking about the pride we feel for the successes of our sons. What about your son?" The fourth man replied: "My son is gay and makes a living dancing as a stripper at a nightclub." The three friends said:"What a shame...what a disappointment." The fourth man replied: "No, I'm not ashamed. He's my son and I love him.He hasn't done too bad either. His birthday was two weeks ago, and he received a beautiful 30,000 square foot mansion,a brand new jet and a top of the line Mercedes from his three boyfriends."  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 11-03-2006 10:09 AM                        Rated G A Greek man and an Italian man were sitting down one day debating who had the superior culture. The Greek says, "We have the Parthenon." The Italian says, "We have the Coliseum." The Greek says, "We had great mathematicians." The Italian says, "We had the Roman Empire ." And so on and so on for hours, until finally the Greek lights up and says... "We invented sex." The Italian nods slowly and thinks, then replies, "That is true -- but it was Italians who introduced it to women."  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 11-16-2006 04:18 PM                        Rated G Ms. Martha Lost San Francisco Tourist: "Excuse me sir, could you direct me to the Golden State Ferry?" Effeminate Guy: "You're Speaking to him, Darlink!" [ 11-21-2006, 08:10 AM: Message edited by: Bob Maar ]  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 11-21-2006 08:09 AM                        Rated G Elaine My perfect man is smart, funny, good-looking, a good dresser, sensitive, and he won't chase other women. So what I figured out is that my perfect man is gay.  |  IP: Logged

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