"Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives."

"Experts are saying there is a new chapter being written about the
stock market yeah,Chapter 11!"

--Jay Leno

"Without friends no one would choose to live, though he had all other
goods."

"Sadness flies away on the wings of time."

"Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up."

"If you want an accounting of your worth, count your friends."

"I'm not making this up. A major cat-food maker is going to start a TV show for cats. It's called "Meow TV." As if your cat didn't do anything already, now it's going to sit around and watch TV. You know what this is going to lead to – kitty porn! "

"I love these experts on TV. They keep saying that this is just a
paper loss. Too bad paper is what money is printed on. "

"The secret of getting ahead is getting started. The secret of getting startis breaking your complex over whelming tasks into small manageable tasks, and then starting on the first one."

"I took all my money out of the stock market last week, I was smart. But then over the weekend I bet it all on Tiger Woods."

"In Miami today the two America West pilots who got drunk failed
to show up for their arraignment. I guess it was scheduled during
happy hour."

"True Happiness..arises,in the first place, from the enjoyment of one's self,and in the next from the friendship and conversation of a few select companions."

-- Joseph Addison

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind
don't matter and those who matter don't mind."

"You cannot always have happiness, but you can always give happiness."

"Al-Qaeda is once again calling for the destruction of America. I got news for them: They can't ruin the American way of life – only Wall Street can do that! "