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Author
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Topic: Hey you, you suck! (AKA: Outing bad film handlers)
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Randy Stankey
Film God

Posts: 6539
From: Erie, Pennsylvania
Registered: Jun 99
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posted 12-15-2004 10:22 AM
Splicer abuse is a Hot-Button issue with me.
I would go around to the theaters on my route and collect all the broken splicers. I'd take them home and work on them in my spare time. There was one time when I had a dozen busted up splicers in my living room! There was several thousand dollars worth of smashed up equipment in a pile. (I think I even posted a picture of them.)
I would sit there for hours on end, taking splicers apart, collecting up all the good pieces and putting them back together to make good splicers. Then I'd take them to the post office and ship them back to the theaters.
I would go to a theater, no less than a week later, and look for the splicer. They were all INVARIABLY trashed again! Of course, nobody did it! Of course, nobody knows who did! To hear the kids at the theater tell the story, they were just sitting on the table and they just FELL APART when nobody was looking! (If I ever get my hands on Nobody, I'll strangle him!)
My boss was starting to bitch about how much money I was spending on postage! So, I hatched a plan: I would make up one more "Franken-Splicer" but this time I would put Loc-Tite on every screw and put red nail polish on all the screw heads!
Wouldn't you know it... That splicer was the only one to survive!
If you want to clean a splicer, here's what you do:
1) Take off he razor blades. (You should be able to use your fingers to remove the screws.)
2) Open the bottom compartment. (Small Phillips screwdriver.)
3) Dump out the punch holes and wipe out the compartment then close the compartment.
4) Take a toothbrush and clean out all the junk from between the teeth of the punch head.
5) If necessary, use some alcohol and cotton swabs to clean out the nooks and crannies.
6) Put on new razor blades. (Tighten only with fingers.)
7) Marvel at the work you have done.
That's IT! You need to do NO MORE!
People who fuck up splicers piss me off!
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