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Topic: Miscellaneous - Part Three
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
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posted 10-25-2007 09:24 AM
Rated G ![[Smile]](smile.gif) : Lorraine
SCREAMING SKULLS:
Screaming Skulls are human remains that are supposed to be haunted by the spirit that once lived within them. There are many famous Screaming Skulls and these are believed by some to scream the loudest on the anniversary of their death. Often a Screaming Skull has a lurid history, for example The Screaming Skull of Wardley Hall in Manchester, UK. This skull is said to have belonged to one Roger Downes who was decapitated in a sword fight on London Bridge. His head was delivered back to his home at Wardley Hall and there placed in an opening within the wall on the staircase. Some years later, according to legend, a servant found the head, which was now just a skull, and threw it into the moat that surrounded the old hall. That night Wardley Hall was subjected to a terrible howling storm in which screams said to be from the skull were heard. The next day the then owner ordered the moat drained, retrieved the skull and replaced it in the hole beside the staircase. It remains there to this very day. One Screaming Skull in the town of Bettiscombe UK was reported to have dug itself out of the grave it was placed in having been removed from its previous location in the manor house. The screams were supposedly heard by the townsfolk who, by some accounts, were terrified. The Bettiscombe Skull was also returned to its place in the manor house where the screaming and the digging stopped. It seems that in all events it is best to let Screaming Skulls remain where they are happiest. Perhaps not too surprisingly there are those that doubt the veracity of reports concerning Screaming Skulls.
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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)
Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001
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posted 11-20-2007 04:20 PM
Rated G Ed in Aurora, Ont.
1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The
ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.
2. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you,but don't start anything."
3. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.
4. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
5. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."
6. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"
7. "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home." Doc:"That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."
Patient: "Is it common?" D
Doc: "Well,It's Not Unusual."
8. Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning."
"I don't believe you," says Dolly. "It's true, no bull!" exclaims Daisy.
9. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing tolook at either.
10. DejaMoo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
11. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.
12. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted,"Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know you can't - I've cut off your arms!"
13. I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a mussel.
14. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
15. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says, "Dam!"
16. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly,so they lit a fire in the craft.Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
17. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standingin the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse."But why," they asked, as they moved off. "Because", he said,"I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer."
18. A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goesto a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him "Juan." Year's later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."
19. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he sufferedfrom bad breath. This made him......A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
20. And finally,there was the person who sent twenty different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make themlaugh. No pun in ten did.
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