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Author Topic: Kids and Grand Children Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 11-19-2003 12:34 PM                        Rated G Janine Billy: "I got a hundred in school today." Mother:"That's wonderful,Billy.What did you get a hundred in?" Billy:"Two things,I got fifty in spelling and fifty in arithmetic."  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 11-19-2003 08:28 PM                        Rated G Michele My mother once gave me two sweaters for my birthday. The next time we visited,I made sure to wear one. As we entered her home, instead of the expected smile, she said,"What's the matter? You didn't like the other one?"  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 11-24-2003 10:44 AM                        Rated G B.B. One evening while I was preparing dinner,my daughter came into the kitchen asking for homework help on her vocabulary words."Mom," she asked, "what's a quarter horse?" As I thought of a simple explanation,my five-year-old son piped up,"I know! It's the one they have in front of the grocery store."  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 11-24-2003 09:56 PM                        Rated G Michele Catching her in the act,I confronted our 3-year-old granddaughter,"Are you eating your little sister's grapes?" I demanded. "No," she innocently replied,"I'm helping her share."  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 12-01-2003 03:00 PM                        Rated G One day I found Morris,my five-year-old son,with the telephone, which he quickly hung up when he saw me."What were you doing?" I asked him. "Calling Aunt Sarah." "How could you have called Aunt Sarah?" I asked. "You don't even know her number." "Yes, I do and I did call her," little Morris replied. I wasted a lot of breath trying to convince him that he didn't know her number, but he insisted he had made the call. "Okay," I said finally."What did she say, then,if you called her?" "She told me I had the wrong number."  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 12-01-2003 03:00 PM                        Rated G One day I found Morris,my five-year-old son,with the telephone, which he quickly hung up when he saw me."What were you doing?" I asked him. "Calling Aunt Sarah." "How could you have called Aunt Sarah?" I asked. "You don't even know her number." "Yes, I do and I did call her," little Morris replied. I wasted a lot of breath trying to convince him that he didn't know her number, but he insisted he had made the call. "Okay," I said finally."What did she say, then,if you called her?" "She told me I had the wrong number."  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 12-08-2003 02:40 PM                        Rated G Lorraine A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo,she warned,"Daddy,you shouldn't wear that suit." "And why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning."  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 12-09-2003 08:41 AM                        Rated G Janine My mother wasn't fond of her own birthdays.Like many women her age,when her birthday rolled around she only admitted to being twenty-nine,just as she was the year before. At the ripe old age of twelve,my twin sons had figured out that Grandma was much older than she admitted,but my younger daughter Audrey, took her seriously. She believed every word her grandmother told her.If Grandma said she was twenty-nine,then she was twenty-nine. On my thirtieth birthday,we joined together as a family to celebrate.Audrey had been unusually quiet during the entire birthday celebration. She carried a worried look on her face.After all of the guests left,she couldn't stand it any longer and sadly informed me, "Mama, you're thirty,and Grandma is twenty-nine,I hate to have to tell you this,but you must've been adopted."  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 12-09-2003 11:14 AM                        Rated G At the end of a busy week, my 18-year-old son - eldest of my two kids -- asked me why I had had children. "I could never imagine my life without them," I replied. "But, Mom," he said, "you don't have a life."  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 12-09-2003 12:15 PM                        Rated G Michele It was a difficult subject to bring before his aged mother, but Morris felt that he must. "Mom, you are no longer a spring chicken and you do need to think ahead of what will happen in the future. Why don't we make arrangements about when... you know... when.... God forbid... you pass on?" The mother didn't say anything, just sat there staring ahead. "I mean, Momma, like... how do you want to finally go? To be buried? Cremated?" There was yet another long pause. Then the mother looked up and said, "Son, why don't you simply surprise me?"  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 01-06-2004 07:28 AM                        Rated G My husband and I were discussing our 5-year-old daughter Rosie and at one point I described her as "contrary." Rosie spoke up: "I know what contrary means!" Curious, I asked her what "contrary" meant. "I'm NOT going to tell you!"  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 01-06-2004 07:40 AM                        Rated G Sue Bee I recall a time when my son was about 18 months old... I had him strapped in a backpack and was rushing to catch the bus. Apparently I misstepped and fell down an entire flight of stairs, (13 to be exact). I was bruised, bleeding and I had torn my jeans... but my main concern was, naturally for my child. My fears were alleviated though when from behind me I heard a gleeful giggle followed by, "Again!"  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 01-06-2004 08:42 AM                        Rated G No matter how smart you think you are,a four-year old knows better.When my son was four,he was telling me about his friend, who has five brothers and sisters. "Is your friend the oldest in the family?" I asked him. "No," my son explained, "his dad and mom are the oldest."  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 01-07-2004 08:29 AM                        Rated G B.B. In school one day,a teacher asked my six-year-old nephew why his handwriting wasn't as neat as usual. He explained,"I'm trying out a new font."  |  IP: Logged Bob Maar (Maar stands for Maartini) Posts: 28608 From: New York City & Newport, RI Registered: Feb 2001 posted 01-07-2004 09:08 AM                        Rated G Judie,Judi,Judy One day my young daughter and I were listening to an old tune by Simon and Garfunkel. When the song finished,she asked me,"Well,did Parsley save Rosemary in time?"  |  IP: Logged

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